The Day I Accepted the Dare

How I took my first steps out of a victim mindset into my own personal growth adventure.

I started my dream job at age 24. When my church hired me for administration, it was heaven. To be part of a team that brought transforming hope was everything I had wanted. What could be better than hiding behind a computer, creating databases and developing processes that helped people find the spiritual growth and belonging they craved?

Yet after a few years of being surrounded by big dreamers and passionate, educated leaders, I felt ordinary and insecure. Despite the high-paced environment, I felt listless. Comparing myself to these influencers made me feel like a lost ant.

One day, during a baseball analogy in a staff leadership lesson, I zoned out. My attention rested on someone in the room. Admiration merged into familiar jealousy.

“I wish I was made for greatness, too. If only I could have a God-sized dream that would help others,” I thought.

The wish turned into an inventory of excuses:

I’m not energetic enough.

I can’t talk in a roomful of people.

I don’t have enough education, vivaciousness or skills to pull off a big dream.

A voice interjected my pity party.

“You’re the only one holding yourself back.”

The inner voice wasn’t audible, but it was so distinct I slunk deeper in my seat. Heat crawled up my neck and I hoped no one noticed.

I recognized that voice. He was the Designer of my purpose, my Guide, my Best Friend.

“But…” I started to protest. I wanted to blame others for not giving me opportunities and for not helping me know where to go with my life. I wanted to blame God for the reserved personality and insecurity I had.

“Each person here believes in you,” the still, clear Voice said. “I believe in you. You say you know that, but you’re not acting like it.”

Hot tears welled in my eyes.

God believed in me? I’ve known it, but I had never thought of it that way.

God’s words felt like a dare. I accepted. No longer would I be the one standing in my way if God had created me for more.

My life didn’t change drastically. No one noticed a difference. It would be years before I’d get clear on my dream and develop enough skills and confidence to step into my calling to help others share their message. Yet that dare was my turning point.

If you’re feeling small and scared but hungry to step out in your God-gifted potential, you can join the adventure. The same small shifts that kick-started my journey can help you explore and thrive in your purpose.

Choose to live by God’s belief in you, not your feelings.

I still felt incompetent and invisible that day. I wasn’t going to pretend to be something I wasn’t, but living by my feelings hadn’t helped me. So that day I chose to live by how God saw me. I borrowed God’s belief in me until I believed it myself.

Redefine failure.

Failure no longer meant messing up a task. Now it meant not trying.

Increase your capacity.

Having a big dream one day meant I’d need to handle more pressure, inspire others, be confident, and excel at communication. By learning to recognize and create opportunities to practice, I saw that I’d slowly increase my capacity for more.

Turn fear into courage.

Talking in front of groups made me blank out and get sweaty. Confrontations intimidated me to the point of tears. Small talk at large functions was an agonizing, slow death. But I decided that for a year if any opportunity arose that made me want to run and hide in fear — then I would say yes.

Know this: you were made for more than settling or the daily grind. You have significance worth exploring. And you have everything you need to begin the life God is calling you to. Will you accept your dare?

—

This story inspired the beginning of my book Dare to Decide: Discovering Peace, Clarity and Courage at Life’s Crossroads. You can get started on your own personal dare journey here.